After a sluggish start, Chislow finally got started on his way to school. Thank God Tara wasn’t at home today. She certainly would have woken up Chislow in her own way. Tara had left two days ago for her own school at the University of Jos (UNIJOS). The days when Tara was away from home were days of bliss for him. He took his time to get ready. Ordinarily, it would have taken him a much longer time to get ready but today was a different day. It is not everyday you get a call from the girl of your dreams telling you to be in school before 8:00am. It is only for such an event that you sacrifice your sleep.
Chhislow succeeded in leaving the house at a quarter to seven. He got on a bus headed towards Yaba and relaxed on his seat. He tried to catch up on lost sleep. He didn’t bother about missing his bus stop. He was alighting at the last bus stop. The bus wasn’t moving just yet until it was full. Somewhere in front, shouts of “Yaba! Yaba!” filled the air as Chislow was inundated by the shouts of other conductors who were busy calling out different destinations.
“Abeg give, I say give me money.” It was a beggar wearing dark spectacles that spoke.
“Don’t you know I am hungry?”
Nobody paid attention to the beggar. Most of the passengers pretended not to have heard the beggar. Some were looking very bored with life and wouldn’t have minded anything happening.
“You people no dey read your Bibles? The good book says that where two or more people are gathered together,  there God will provide your needs.” This set everybody in the bus roaring with laughter.
“This is not a joking matter. I want to eat. Please give me money. I want to buy thirty naira Amala, thirty naira pomo and ten naira pure water.”
This made the occupants of the bus laugh all the more.
“You are even asking for pomo when some of us have not tasted common breakfast today. O jare you no dey hungry,” the conductor, a thickset dark complexioned young chap replied with a voice that sounded like a train that was having engine trouble.
“You,” the beggar said pointing to Chislow, “God said, give unto beggars and it shall be given unto you. Honour the poor that your days may be long upon the earth, for this is the only commandment with a blessing.”
You can only imagine the laughter that rocked the bus. Everybody was interested in this beggar who was quoting (in reality, misquoting) scriptures.
“Haven’t you heard that he who does not work should not eat?” This was the driver who was now seated behind the steering wheel.
“Haven’t you heard that there are no jobs in Nigeria?” The beggar replied.
“So, you know that there are no jobs, why then you dey beg us? We too, we no get,” said the conductor.
“Woe unto you who refuse to give, for God has pronounced a curse on you, for I see the hand of President Baba touching fuel again because of your hard hearts.”
“Shattap! Yeye man. Na on top of your head all your curses go land,” said a woman from somewhere behind Chislow. Chislow was beside himself with laughter. He was enjoying every minute of it.
“O boy, what did God say about 2007? Who go be presido?” Chislow decided to ask the beggar.
“That one na simple matter, even you go fit be. Just give me money for Amala and pomo. Any prayer I pray for you go come to pass.”
This was too much for Chislow. He was almost bursting with laughter. He, Chislow, president of Nigeria! Then he stopped laughing as suddenly as he had started. For the beggar called him by his name. Before he could say a thing, the beggar winked at him and disappeared. Chislow recognized the face. There was no way he could forget that face that gave him goose pimples – it was the face of the taxi driver that had dropped him in Unilag the very first day he was  there. Was the taxi driver stalking him?

Share on Facebook